Chapter 19
Scarlet straightened out the bed and looked at it. It appeared just as lumpy and uncomfortable as before. She frowned. Sleeping here was going to take a lot of getting used to after the comfort of Corazon’s bed and the security of sleeping in his arms, but she had healed now, and had to return to duty and to her quarters. She couldn’t remain in Corazon’s bed forever.
No matter how tempting it was.
She sat on the edge of her bed and stared at the empty rows of beds in front of her. They lined the wall either side of the narrow walkway running down the middle. All of them were made and perfect. Grey blankets covered them. It looked so dreary.
“How are you feeling?” A familiar voice stirred her senses and she was immediately on her feet and turning to face the owner of it.
She grimaced as her side hurt and pressed her hand against it.
“Recovering,” she said and her eyes scanned him. “You?”
Troy ran his fingers through his sandy hair and shrugged. “I’ve been better.”
He moved past her and for a moment she thought he was going to leave, but he turned back to face her.
“It’s a nice night tonight. Would you like to walk the walls with me? The medics have informed me that you need exercise.”
Scarlet considered saying no because she didn’t want to anger Corazon, but after everything they had been through together, she couldn’t go through with it. Troy was her friend now, her closest one besides Corazon. When she had been bed-bound, she had thought about him a lot. She had wondered how he was and if he was well now. Several times, she had thought about asking Corazon about Troy, but she knew that it wouldn’t have gone down well. Regardless of his air and how he appeared on the surface, she could see in Corazon’s eyes that he was a little jealous of Troy having feelings for her.
“Sure,” she said and grabbed her cloak. The weather was turning warm now, but her scars and bones ached if she got too cold.
She walked in silence with Troy to the wall and followed him around as he led her towards the South Wall. When he stopped and leaned against the wall, his back to the world and facing the garrison, she moved to stand beside him. Her eyes studied his face, taking in the subtle contours of it as the torchlight highlighted them. It was a relief to see him so like his old self. She had been so scared of him dying.
“I can’t stop thinking about it,” he said in a low, pained voice.
Scarlet frowned and stepped closer to him. Her hand caught his and she held it, offering him silent comfort and hoping he would know that she was right there with him.
“I’m sorry they did that to you,” he said and looked down at her. The warm light flickered on his face. His clear blue eyes searched hers.
She managed a smile. “We both lived.”
“Only because of a miracle. That Corazon was alive...” He turned his face away from her. “I said I am not half the man—”
“You cannot blame yourself for what happened!” she interjected and tugged on his arm so he looked back at her. Tears shone in his eyes and her heart ached to see them. “Troy... you tried to protect me but in a situation like that, it was impossible. They were going to torture me regardless. You couldn’t have protected me. No one could.”
Troy sighed and let go of her hand, moving a short distance away. He stood with his back to her.
“I should have tried harder. I could have escaped... I could’ve...”
She hated to hear all the hurt in his voice and see it in his body language. He wrapped his arms around himself and his shoulders sagged. How long had these thoughts been eating away at him?
“I’m leaving, Scarlet.”
Her eyes shot wide and she shook her head even though he couldn’t see it.
“Troy—” she started but he cut her off.
“I do not deserve to remain here, to be in sight of my sire and know that I have failed him... I have failed you...”
Scarlet walked up to him, her footsteps silent on the damp stones. She hesitated for only a split second before placing her hand against his back and sliding it up to his shoulder. Holding it, she moved past him, coming to stand before him. She looked up into his eyes, cursing the tears in them and hers.
“Don’t leave because of me, Troy,” she whispered. “This company needs you... Corazon needs you... I...”
“Need me?” he finished for her.
She nodded and bit her lower lip. Her gaze fell to his chest and she took her hand away.
The silence was painful.
She had to say something to break it, to explain what she meant by her words.
Swallowing hard, she fought to find her courage and then raised her eyes to meet his again.
“You’ve looked after me so well in Corazon’s absence, but more than that, you’ve become a friend. I can’t imagine this place without you... this world without you. When we were captive... when they... hurt you... I wanted to kill them all, I wanted to break down and cry, and I wanted to see you again... please don’t go away because of me and some misplaced sense of failure.” She paused and heaved a sigh. Her hand found his again for a moment and then she stepped towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck. She closed her eyes and sighed against his neck. “Please don’t leave. You stood by me all those months. You protected me as best as anyone could. What happened wasn’t your fault. You tried to keep me safe from them, but it was impossible.”
His arms wrapped around her waist and she flinched when her wounds hurt, but said nothing. She didn’t want to upset him further by making him realise that he was hurting her.
Opening her eyes, she stared straight into Corazon’s where he was standing at the end of the wall. She thought he was going to say something, but when she held her hand up to signal that it wasn’t what he thought it was, he simply nodded and leaned against the wall, waiting.
She sighed again and thanked him with a smile as she held Troy close to her, hoping that her words were sinking in and that he wouldn’t leave.
“Troy?”
“I’m a dead man, aren’t I?” he whispered against her neck and she realised that he had sensed Corazon too.
“No,” she said in a hushed voice. “He’s fine... but I’m not... are you?”
Troy nodded. “I will stay Scarlet. I can still protect you. You are always getting yourself into trouble.”
There was a smile in his voice and she was glad to hear it. She let him go and smiled up at him when he looked down into her eyes.
“Thank you... I was one step away from making Corazon refuse your transfer.”
He gave a chuckle and shook his head.
“I should go or I will be transferred regardless.” His eyes slid to one side, indicating Corazon and his meaning.
She would never let Corazon transfer Troy, and she doubted that he would anyway. He was more likely to fight him.
“Take care of yourself. You’re still not fully healed,” she said.
He stopped just as he was walking past her and shook his head. “That would be the pot calling the kettle black. I will see you on the East Wall. You have duty there tonight.”
Scarlet smiled as she watched him go, turning so her eyes could follow him. When he was lost from view in the darkness, she looked over her shoulder at Corazon and then went to him.
“It’s not what it—”
Corazon pressed his finger to her lips, silencing her. “I know. It was a nice thing that you did for Troy. I was not about to allow him to leave the company, but at least now he knows that there are others besides myself who would like him to remain. I do not think he has forgiven himself yet.”
She looked in the direction of Troy as he crossed the courtyard of the garrison, heading back towards his quarters.
“He blames himself for what happened,” Corazon said, his voice soft in the silence of the night.
“I don’t understand why. Even you wouldn’t have been able to protect me.”
“For the same reason I blame myself.”
She frowned and looked into Corazon’s dark eyes, searching them for a reason behind his words. He was frowning too, his jaw set firmly and his expression one of regret.
“Why?”
“Because I should have been here to protect you. I should have given my life in order to protect yours.” There was so much feeling in those words. She still wasn’t used to this new Corazon—so open about his feelings for her and so much more relaxed around her.
“No one could have protected me,” Scarlet said, still not understanding why both men were blaming themselves for what had happened to her. Only the humans were to blame.
“Foolish Scarlet,” Corazon said and leaned against the wall, staring off into the distance.
She didn’t think she was foolish, but his words made her feel that way. She stared at him, struggling to figure it all out.
“It does not matter that we could not have protected you,” his voice was low, laced with feeling that melted her heart. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye. “It only matters that we should have protected you.”
She sighed and leaned against the wall beside him, close enough that they were touching. Looking up into his eyes, she wanted nothing more than to tell him he was the fool, but there was something in his gaze that stole her voice. There was so much love in it. It crashed over her and swept her away, until she was just staring into his eyes and the moment was stretching into forever.
She never wanted to look away.
His eyes slipped shut, his head tilting to one side as he leaned towards her. Her eyes reluctantly closed as he inched closer, until she could feel his soft breath against her face. Her whole body jolted and buzzed when his lips brushed hers, tender and slow, telling her without words all the feelings she had just seen in his eyes. She leaned into the kiss, using it to reassure her that this was really happening—she was alive, as was he, and he loved her, as she loved him.
He broke away and looked down into her eyes, his own still full of the emotions she had felt in his kiss.
“Are you feeling better?” he whispered.
She nodded. “A lot better.”
“Then we cannot delay any longer.” His look turned grim and he turned his head, staring towards the human village.
It was clear what he was saying.
It was time to attempt to end this war.
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